Wednesday, June 14, 2006

If you are reading this, you are too close to Israel.

I most likely will not post until I get to Israel (if I ever get there, according to my parents, who think that I can lose my way trying to get out of a paper bag. Rest assured, parents. Vse vrodi horosho. The operative word being vrode.) I am not nearly packed enough, not nearly ready to leave, not nearly in the right frame of mind for Israel. The Israel frame of mind is this special feeling that you get when you land in Israel. Israel is no different from any other country. It has the same soil, the same people, the same buereacracy and rudeness. Yet why does the Israeli frame of mind develop, one where everything, from the sun, to the sea, to the most mundane piece of land you walk on, becomes special? At least it does to me, probably because I do not live there. But the whole point is for me to get a taste of that. For me to be able to talk not from a zealous Zionist perspective, but from one of having lived in Israel and seen it all, to becoming cynical about everything and reclaiming the title, "there is nothing new under the sun."

I don't want that to happen though, and, as a result, might stay in the Israel frame of mind, which starts the minute you get off the plane, and stops as soon as you encounter customs. Just kidding. If my parents stop nagging anytime soon, I will be able to get in that state of mind and be able to call a taxi in Hebrew, arrive at my apartment, meet Batami (one of my three roommates,) and start getting ripped off in expensive department stores that cater to tourists. Hopefully I will also meet some Russians so I never ever have to speak Hebrew with my horrible accent, my horrible horrible vocabulary, and my horrible horrible classroom Hebrew education. :) And then I will go to work and find out what e-banking is all about.

As a wise anonymous man once said, "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." As Vicki says, "A journey of 11 hours begins with getting up at 4 am to go to the airport." There had better be coffee-like beverages on the plane. And falafel. After all, part of living the Israeli lifestyle is changing my food pyramid to falafel three times a day. It's a sacrifice, but one I'm totally willing to make.

להיתראות,ומחרותיים בארץ

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